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4:19pm on Sunday, 18th December, 2005:

The Lion, the Corpse and the Scratched Box


We went to see The Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe today. It wasn't as bad as I was expecting it to be. The CGI was a little ropey in places, and they managed to make Lucy as obnoxious as always, but the casting for Edmund and Susan was good and Peter wasn't as sanctimonious as he sometimes is. Tilda Swinton's White Witch was the best I've seen, but then again Liam Neeson's VO for Aslan wasn't really appropriate (not his fault, he just doesn't have the right voice for a lion — Brian Cox was originally slated to do it, and would probably have been better).

If Lucy's magic healing potion was good enough to stop Edmund from dying, how come it couldn't cure his cut lip or the bruise on his cheek?

Had I been organising the party, I would have gone for a different make-up. Lucy is a fair enough healer, but Susan makes a dismal rogue: she shoots arrows, but that's it. She should maybe have chosen a magic-user, she looks like she could hurl the odd fireball if she tried. Peter's OK as a fighter, perhaps a paladin if Edmund also stayed as a fighter. However, I'd have maybe made Edmund a rogue, given his sneakiness, or maybe have him as a ranger and make Susan dual class rogue/MUser if she bucked her ideas up. Nah, she has the bow, she should be a fighter/MUser elf.

These fantasy authors know nothing about how things work. Sometimes, I think they just make it all up.

PS: The title of this post comes from the name I cooked up with my friend Greg for his games magazine when we were at school. Let a lion loose with a witch and a wardrobe, and that's what you end up with...

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Copyright © 2005 Richard Bartle (richard@mud.co.uk).