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1:37pm on Tuesday, 29th December, 2015:

Top Tip Tip


In our part of the Borough of Colchester, rubbish collection is weekly on a Friday. This is fine, except once every seven years (on average) Christmas Day is on a Friday.Christmas is when we have more rubbish than any other time of year, but we can't put it out to be collected as there's no collection. There isn't one on Boxing Day, either.

OK, so we just need to wait a week to put out our rubbish; well, we would, except a week later is New Year's Day and it also has no collection. We'll finally get one on January 2nd. That means keeping eight bags of general rubbish, one bag of plastic and one box of cardboard in our garage, adding more to it until Saturday.

Or, alternatively, it means a trip to the tip!

So, this morning I went to the tip.

I was not alone in this endeavour. The queue was out onto the main road, maybe 40 vehicles in length. The council workers who normally stand around rooting through your stuff to see if it's salvageable (er, I mean recyclable) were instead showing where there were parking spaces and occasionally getting stroppy with drivers whose parking talents did not match the conditions to which they had been allocated. As a result, the queue moved surprisingly quickly and I was at the front in about ten minutes. They should do it more often.

Advice to council workers: if you ask people what is in a black bin liner they're about to dump in one of your skips, they will invariably reply "rubbish". Really, they will. If you want to know what kind of rubbish they have in their bags, ask "What kind of rubbish is in that?". You may then find yourself furnished with an answer that you can use as a basis for determining whether to allow them to dump the bag in their skip of choice or not. Try it! You may be surprised!

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Copyright © 2015 Richard Bartle (richard@mud.co.uk).