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5:27pm on Friday, 24th April, 2015:



My wife has worked for the same company for 30 years, so she got a 30-year-anniversary present from them. They gave her a catalogue of things to choose from, and she went with this (which arrived today):

It's a garden bench.

It's a self-assembly garden bench in a box on two wooden pallets nailed together, to which it has been wrapped in industrial plastic so that it wouldn't fall over in the large, articulated lorry that delivered it. We couldn't leave it outside, so I had to move the car out of the garage so we had somewhere to put it away from weather and the view of passing casual criminals.

I've now got it out of the plastic, but I'm going to need a crowbar to dismantle the pallets.

Worse, I made the mistake of looking it up on Amazon about three weeks ago to see what its dimensions are, and I'm still being plagued with ads for it.

Why couldn't she have just gone for the earrings?

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Copyright © 2015 Richard Bartle (richard@mud.co.uk).