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2:06pm on Sunday, 29th July, 2007:

Luton Airport


We're flying to Cyprus from Luton airport. I've never flown from Luton airport before, so here's my opinion on the subject:

it sucks.

This isn't much of a complaint, of course — all UK airports suck. The way Luton airport sucks is different to the way other airports suck, though.

Firstly, getting to it sucks. There are roadworks on the M1 that don't signpost the exit, and when you've driven to the next junction and turned round and come back, you find there are roadworks on the airport approach road so they reroute you through Luton. Of all the problems, this one of access is most likely to be solved (roadworks don't take forever, and if there were none then it would be very convenient to get to).

Secondly, the long-term car park sucks. It was almost full when we got there. We drove around for 15 minutes before we found a space. Well, we found spaces before then, just they weren't wide enough to put a car in, except maybe if you flipped it on its side and pushed. Oh, and it'll cost us £90 when we take our car out next week when we get back.

Thirdly, the check-in queues suck. We joined one an hour before we were due to check in, and 15 minutes later we were half-way to the front — not because it had moved, but because it had doubled in length. Only when they put 3 people on the check-in desks for the flight instead of 1 did it discernably move. We finally checked in at exactly the time we'd been told to check in: 2 hours before the flight.

Fourthly, the food sucks. Actually, it sucks so much it blows. It was both expensive and cheap at the same time. I shan't be buying food here ever, ever again — and I won't be buying the stuff they tell you is food but when it comes to eating it it turns out to be grease, either.

Security didn't suck. We got through really quickly, and didn't have to take our shoes off. This is one area where the people at Stanstead ought to pay attention. OK, so the security staff were so numerous that they didn't have much to do so they occupied themselves by talking to each other in assorted languages (including English at times), which meant that in the end no-one was doing the small amount of work that did have to be done. Still, we got through quickly so tra-la-la.

The lounge sucks. That's where I am at the moment. The screen says, "wait in lounge", but it doesn't mention that there's nowhere to sit because everyone else is also waiting in the lounge.

Fortunately, there's a Krispy Kreme doughnut shop here, charging only £1.35 per doughnut, so all is well.

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Copyright © 2007 Richard Bartle (richard@mud.co.uk).