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8:16am on Tuesday, 7th November, 2006:



I went to Newcastle for the day yesterday to speak at a conference. Well, Gateshead rather than Newcastle, but basically Newcastle. I did my usual barnstorming speech that everyone found fascinating but of no use to them whatsoever, but that's not what I'm posting about.

No, I'm posting about security. Specifically, the security checks at Stansted Airport. Even more specifically, the fact that it took me an hour to get through the queue, plus another 5 minutes afterwards while they X-rayed my shoes.

EasyJet ask that you be at the departure gate 40 minutes before departure. They open their check-in desks 2 hours before departure. This means that if you're right at the front of the check-in queue at exactly the moment it opens, you only have 15 minutes to get from the security check to the gate before you risk losing your seat.

I made it in the nick of time, but the plane was late so I had to hang around anyway. Even so, EasyJet dumped someone's luggage on the tarmac because they didn't get there in time. EasyJet=Easily Jettisoned.

Oh, and the chocolate machine at 50p and gave me no chocolate. This made it even more annoying when I got to Newcastle with only £3.08 in change and the £3 Metro tickets that I'd been told cost £3 were £3.20. I had a £20 note, but there were no ticket staff (or indeed anywhere for there to be tickets staff). There was, however, a change machine. My £20 was duly converted into 20 £1 coins that weighed my jacket down at one side for the rest of the day. That's nothing to do with security, but I'm in rant mode so I don't care.

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Copyright © 2006 Richard Bartle (richard@mud.co.uk).